Love with old men is as the sun upon the snow, it dazzles more than it warms. – Elizabeth Evans. – Solitaire Parke, 119. – Billy Crystal, 112. – Rita Rudner, 89. My wife is really sentimental. The great question which I have not been able to answer… is, “What does a woman want? 73. Jean Kerr, 77 My wife is really sentimental. Love; A temporary insanity curable by marriage. Romance is the icing, but love is the cake. Love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock. Love is friendship set on fire. I want someone who will pause his game just to answer my call. – Socrates, 160. Pearl Bailey, 17 If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question? If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question? 26. Sometimes it’s just another way to bleed.-Laurell K. Hamilton “ I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it? 104. 65. If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back. Richard Lewis, 39 My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. 58. It wasn’t love at first sight. – Joan Crawford, 146. True love is inexhaustible; the more you give, the more you have. 30 Funniest One Liner Jokes But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. Miles Davis, 75 My wife, Mary, and I have been married for forty-seven years, and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else. Garry Shandling, 40 Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements. – Helen Gurley Brown, 79. – Albert Einstein, 28. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning. Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there. While reading, really enjoyed a lot. Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there. – Joan Rivers, 97. – Jewish Proverbangerfield, 123. Professor Irwin Corey, 47 A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it. 30. – Lemony Snicket, 151. I had a dream that i still loved you. – Joseph E. Morris, 148. Romantic love is mental illness. My last love is just like that thong peter griffin borrowed from me… Never getting it back. – Agatha Christie, 163. – FaithHopeNLove, 122. Marriage is a great institution for those who like institutions. – Phyllis Schlafly. – Charles Schultz. It elevates the thoughts and flattens the stomach. Beautiful short love quotes. 7. 25 Really Funny Harry Potter Jokes Will you lend me a kiss? Romantic love is mental illness. In doing it, a writer chooses to forgo original authorship so as to play havoc with a foreign original in a process of imitation, zigzagging between the foreign and receiving languages but in the last analysis canceling the first in favor of the second.” My head and my heart will never cease their endless war. 165. Short funny love quotes for her Collection Inspiring; 4. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt. – Woody Allen, 101. – Coleridge, 154. I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. 1. 27 Best President Jokes Short Love Quotes. It is not love that makes a relationship complicated; it’s the people in it who do. The key to a successful relationship is to clear your internet history. cute funny sayings for him and short fun loving quotes. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else. Light travels faster than sound. Anonymous, 48 My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light. I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it. The four most important words in any marriage. 120 Best Funny Pick Up Lines Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator. In any perfect relationship men should remember it’s a matter of direction; she takes what’s right and you take what’s left. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. If you can fake that, you’re in. Why not share these funny love quotes and romantic sayings on Pinterest and other social media sites? 29. 1. Here are the 31 best funny love quotes from comedians that perfectly nail the hilarious side of relationships. Love and laughter go together like peanut butter and jelly. Do, or do not. – Fran Lebowitz. – Miles Davis. Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner. Every now and then she stops to breathe. My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. David Sedaris, 67 There is nothing better for the spirit or the body than a love affair. 42. When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don’t answer because I’m eating. We have a lot of text messages on our site for you which we believe will satisfy your desire to be funny … Here we share 60 short funny quotes and funny wise sayings with beautiful images and funny pictures. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. I love you so much I’d fight a bear for you. The quotes are good and perfect and am gona enjoy now. If you enjoyed reading this page, follow him on, 35 Funny Spongebob Roasts, Quotes, And Jokes, 99+ Really Funny Comebacks, Insults, & Burns List, 60 Top Abraham Lincoln Famous Quotes You Need To Know, 30 Top Tao Te Ching Quotes You Need To Know, Ultimate Emmy Noether Biography With Interesting Facts, 93 Funny One Liner Jokes So Good You'll Laugh Till You Cry, 37 Best Anthony Jeselnik Jokes & Quotes That Will Make You LOL, 55 Best Mitch Hedberg Quotes & Jokes That Will Make You LOL, 55 Best Funny Irish Blessings, Sayings, & Proverbs, 35 Best Funny Drinking Toasts For Friends You Need To Know, 15 Funny Insulting Names To Call Your Friends & More To Know, 49 Most Savage Roasts And Jokes List That Will Shut All Jerks Up, 99+ [Unique] Funny & Serious Dog Names You Need To Know. – Leopold Fetchner, 2. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. Looking for the best funny phrases and wise words to sayings about life. Franklin P. Jones, 42 Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them. Love is being stupid together. – Johnny Carson, 106. I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. – George Carlin, 147. Marriage is not just spiritual communion and passionate embraces; marriage is also three-meals-a-day and remembering to carry out the trash. Jean Illsley Clarke, 35 Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful. – Tim Allen, 137. Your email address will not be published. Girls cry their eyes out until they are dry, while boys drink their beers until their mugs are all dried up. Honesty is the key to a relationship. Bess Myerson Ray Romano, 44 Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there. Jerry Seinfeld, 63 Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator. You’ll discover the funniest lines ever on friends, family, love, women, men, fun (with great images). The four most important words in any marriage. 83. – Rodney D, 121. Share these funny quotes about love with all your friends on Facebook. That’s how wonderful it is to wake up knowing you are mine and I am yours. Love is sharing your popcorn. There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. Jackie Mason, 31 To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful. If these reasons aren't good enough for you, get it because we're insecure and need your approval. 93. 136. – Pauline Thomason, 141. My wife gets all the money I make. An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her. About 30 pounds. Our research team do research and collect best quotes at one place. Phyllis Schlafly, 29 What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? You’ll know a person is in love when he can laugh like a fool by himself and keeps a goofy smile plastered on his face all day long. Adventures in Dating: Memoirs of a Single Mom, Adventures in Dating: Memoirs of Midlife Relationships. – Judith Viorst, 10. Woody Allen, 51 If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools. 63. True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. – Jessica Martin, 81. 20 Really Funny Grammar Jokes – Paul Valery, 144. Rita Rudner, 56 By all means marry. When life appears like dead end and then these inspirational sayings enables you to forget what offers happened. Looking for the best romantic love quotes pictures, photos & images? – Erich Segal, 130. My brother is gay and my parents don’t care, as long as he marries a doctor. “When tempted to fight fire with fire, … Love is sharing your popcorn. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. Johnny Carson, 66 Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone’s feelings. – Jerry Seinfeld, 96. 159. – Jack Benny. Now I can use them to wish by boyfriend. Get it because it has lots of funny jokes that will make you laugh. – Katherine Mansfield, 131. For those who love to keep a collection of funny sayings, these quotes could be handy when you want to cheer someone up or simply have a good laugh! I was married by a judge. One Valentine’s Day I gave her a ring and to this day she has never forgotten those three little words that were engraved inside — Made in Taiwan. Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing. – Rowland, 133. 20 Best Banker Jokes – Cindy Garner, 59. 67. If you are a fan of Spider Man, you may be familiar with these quotes. Required fields are marked *, Below is a list of research studies that are currently open for participation. Thanks very much for for this..sunkanmi oko apinke love it.. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. I think its a best funny love quotes. Staying in love for more than 5 years is almost impossible. Go and find him. By all means marry. This Valentine’s Day, let the jolly in you celebrate the ups and downs of your relationship with these 30 funny love quotes. It all depends on what you put into it. He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself. Loss for words? 37. – Bob Hope, 140. 39. The rest cheat in Europe. “Your voice is my favorite sound.” – Joan Rivers, 12. If you can fake that, you’re in. – Oscar Wilde, 142. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. I want to be your sweet good morning, your lovely good night and your most painful goodbye. In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Why do they call it beauty sleep when you wake up looking terrible? Cerano de Bergerac, 7 I wasn’t kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth! – Bree Luckey, 120. Love doesn’t make the world go round. – Elizabeth Evans. – Jackie Mason, 3. Love is when the other person’s happiness is more important than your own. It’s worth a thousand and more. – George Burns. Marriage is a lot like the army, everyone complains, but you’d be surprised at the large number that re-enlist. Plus, it’s free. Charles Schultz, 2 People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. A man in love is not complete until he is married. Jack Benny, 76 Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. 128. – Richard Jeni, 94. – Lilly Tomlin, 138. – Russell Brand, 88. Redmerski, 115. ~ Charles Schultz. – Quoteistan, 125. However, the funny and entertaining moments you share will make you crave for each other’s presence even more. Follow us on Pinterest and we will love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog. Richard Pryor, 36 A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. Throwing funny and cute words of love to your partner gives a whole new meaning to your relationship. Short funny love quotes for him “Translation is a form of passive aggression. 66. Cindy Garner, 30 Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. Short Funny Quotes are not difficult to get any more as you are now on our site and we will help you out in every way. He believes in bringing about positive change to the world through good-natured humor and innovative technology. I scoured the internet for some things to make you smile. Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener. English Proverb, 5 Love is the same as like except you feel sexier. People should fall in love with their eyes closed.-Andy Warhol “ Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.-George Burns “ Love sucks. – Phyllis Diller, 5. You are the cause why my eyeglasses fog. Funny quotes on life relationship advice Words To Make You Laugh “If you love someone let them go. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. Helen Rowland, 65 I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. Or maybe sometimes it feels like oil and water. Love is being stupid together. Will Ferrell, 69 If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back. *Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc., or its affiliates. – Erich Segal. Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” During my days, the teenagers talk about movies, music and love. But they don’t really know me. If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back. 157. 170. 22. See more ideas about funny one liners, short funny quotes, funny quotes about life. I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it. The course of true love never did run smooth. A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt. People should fall in love with their eyes closed. Kevin Hart Funny Quotes. My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. I wasn’t kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth. – Albert Einstein, 150. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. You share such a great stuff. Anonymous, Share these funny quotes about love with all your friends on Facebook, 28 Marriage is like pantyhose. Cute Funny Love Quotes. – Kathy Mohnke, 53. The photos you provided may be used to improve Bing image processing services. You will always be my 11:11 and the name I write in my naughty list. – Agatha Christie, 76. Please Like Us On Facebook Or Follow Us On Pinterest Now, 30 Best Funny Movie Quotes He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself. When my head says ‘I don’t care, my heart says ‘I do care’. I will write the WhatsApp Quote & Status myself to make the Status site more unique and good looking than other places. 41. Love develops through friendship. If you love ’em in the morning with their eyes full of crust; if you love ’em at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love. – Chico Marx, 11. Marriage has no guarantees. Hehehehe, wow such a great funny love quotes nice quotes man keep posting. 40. 94. 114. Your email address will not be published. – Zsa Zsa Gabor. As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy. 24. I can relate to this quote “A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt” – Johnny Carson, 168. Romance is the icing, but love is the cake. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. 29 What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. 28 Marriage is like pantyhose. – Chelsea Peretti, 90. Katherine Mansfield, 52 Women hope men will change after marriage, but they don’t; men hope women won’t change, but they do. Jewish Proverb, Check Out The Best Funny Marriage Jokes That Will Make You Laugh, 12 I was married by a judge. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. 18. – Bettina Arndt, 62. If love is a blunder, then it means that the biggest fault in my life is loving you. My wife and I were happy for 20 years – then we met. But they don’t really know me. Check out more short funny quotes and sayings. I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough. You can’t put a price tag on love. Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements. Thanks for sharing. 77 Best Funny Love Quotes It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Love quotes pictures for him. If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools. Well not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu. 64. In love, somehow, a man’s heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place. When you’re in love, it’s the most glorious two-and-a-half days of your life. – Joyce Brothers. Kathy Mohnke, 41 Love doesn’t make the world go round. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?